Oh, Enough Already: Ojani Noa Vs. JLo, Part One Million

By Vanessa Beatriz Soto

OMG, you guys. Ojani Noa's back on his soapbox yapping about the alleged video of JLo dirty-dancing for Puff Daddy and smooching with another lady. You know how there are people with whom you've been in relationships who turn out to be great friends, even if the romance doesn't work out? And then there are the people we've crossed paths with that we just plain wish we had never met... At this point, Jennifer Lopez would probably like to stuff Ojani Noa into a cannon and shoot him into outer orbit. I know I would...

That doesn't seem to be the case for Noa, though. He's hanging on, tooth and nail, to his fifteen minutes of 'fame,' and he is totally shameless about it. Ojani is so up in her business that he's still talking to newspapers about JLo (who, let's have a reality check, here, is now a over 40 years old and the mom of two little kids) more than a decade after the dissolution of their short-lived 1997 marriage.

Is it possible that this guy is kind of-sort of maybe a little bit of a loser? I'm just saying. Guy, let it GO.

But no.

So here we are, walloping this old dead horse again. Because Ojani Noa is an artist. The man is a FILMMAKER. And for him, this is all about what is legally permissible as material for his documentary. We've been reporting on this story for a while now, as the exes battle in court to determine whether certain recordings can be used by Noa.

But this bit is a new twist: the FILMMAKER claims that a video (or videos - sources vary) in his possession, which feature a fully-dressed Jenny From The Block grinding on ex-love Sean "P. Diddy" combs, among others, and also sharing a same-sex kiss, is NOT a sex tape and is therefore fair game for his upcoming cinematic work. JLo's lawyers want to declare the tape off-limits, claiming that the scenes captured there are private and personal, while Ojani's legal counsel claim that because the star is fully dressed, the video cannot be classified as such.

Noa's team has considered asking Diddy to appear in court, to testify that a sex tape does exist. According to what I understand of their logic, if Diddy states under oath that a "real" sex tape exists, and is distinctly different in its content from Ojani Noa's "non-sex" tape, then that would make the "non-sex" tape  legit material for the movie.

No lie, you guys, Ojani appeared on the popular Mexican news-and-gossip TV show "Ventaneando" just a couple of weeks ago, claiming that all he wants is to make this documentary of his, in order to clear his name and move on with his life:

"¿Cuál es el propósito de Ojani al mostrar esos videos? Ojani mismo contesta que quiere hacer un documental de su vida para limpiar su imagen, cerrar ese tormentoso capítulo y seguir adelante con su vida.

Noa dijo que una juez ya le dio un permiso para empezar a hacer el casting para los actores del documental y recalcó nuevamente que el contenido de los videos, que suman alrededor de 11 horas de duración, son situaciones normales y no hay nada de ámbito sexual."

You guys, I just know his movie's going to be SO AWESOME.

I can see it now, live from the Oscars: "And the award for Keeping it Classy goes to Ojani Noa."

But that's just me. What do you think? Would you go see a movie about the highs and lows of JLo and ONo!'s ten-month romance?

Tell us in the comments!

Tags blogger: Vanessa Beatriz Soto, J.LO, Jennifer Lopez, Ojani Noa, P. Diddy, Sean Combs